


The Curtain of the Night (brings fear, not delight)

by LittleMissAgrafina



Series: Comfortember 2020 [2]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Anxiety, But tony helps him because he's a good dad, F/M, Gen, How Do I Tag, Hugs, Irondad, Panic Attacks, Parent Pepper Potts, Peter Parker Has Panic Attacks, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is a Mess, Peter doesn't sleep to avoid anxiety and nightmares, Platonic Cuddling, Precious Peter Parker, Sleep Deprivation, Slight Dissociation, There's fluff I promise, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, spiderson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:40:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27352117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleMissAgrafina/pseuds/LittleMissAgrafina
Summary: Tony had taken one look at Pater and immediately stated that they were skipping the lab that day and instead would be heading up to the living room to lounge and watch movies."You look like a racoon, kid." The man had poked his cheek near the corner of his eye playfully but Peter could hear the underlying concern in his voice."As if you look any better." Peter had sassed back, cringing inwardly at the obvious forced lightness to his voice.Yeah, his charade wouldn't last a second around Tony.---Comfortember Day 2. First Day/Night + Day 24. Panic Attack
Relationships: Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Pepper Potts, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: Comfortember 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995808
Comments: 19
Kudos: 219
Collections: Comfortember 2020





	The Curtain of the Night (brings fear, not delight)

**Author's Note:**

> So it make this a little easier for myself, I'm cheating and combining some of the prompts where I think they can work nicely together so there won't be 30 separate works but I will still try and use every prompt if I can:)  
> Hope you guys like it! Please lemme know what you think in the comments!♡  
> As usual, thank you to Addi and Edgey for betaing for me!  
> And to my darling @Scooter3scooter as well for helping me to think of ideas and just letting me brainstorm and blurt my thoughts. You're amazing darling! I love you 3000

  
  


Day and night were very different things for Peter.

  
  


During the day he could be happy, forget about his worries, his stress, and his fears. He could shove it aside and carry on with what he needed to do. School work, patrols, lab days, and days with May helping distract him. 

  
  


On some days he could feel almost normal, almost like there wasn't a cloud hanging over his head bringing darkness, despair, and fear with it. On some days he could smile, and he could be happy, and he could _forget_ the bad times. Forget the anxiety that was constantly nestled in his chest, and forget that it was waiting to tighten and constrict once again.

  
  


That couldn't happen at night. As darkness fell so did he, his thoughts drifting towards those of failure, of disappointment, of _wrong._ The thoughts that were _him._

  
  


He didn't like those thoughts. They burned, twisted and warping as they wormed themselves into his head and heart. They brought his fears and his faults to life in the darkness.

  
  


Everyday when the sun fled, everyday that evening drew to a close, Peter would be filled with dread for the sleeplessness or the nightmares when he slept, the loneliness or the terror when he didn't (which was more often than he ever wanted to admit to.)

  
  


Peter would push his homework later and later, patrol for as long as he could, talk to Ned and MJ for as long as he could, all in a bid to stay awake _just a bit longer_ . To stay safe and pretend as if his mind wasn't his enemy _just a little more._

  
  


And most of the time he got away with late or even entirely sleepless nights because May wasn't always home, her shifts at the hospital running late, being a night shift, or the times she had to pull a double. Peter hated deceiving her, lying to her and pretending that he was okay and asleep when she _did_ arrive home.

  
  


He hated it but he didn't know how else to cope because this was working. Maybe not in the best or most healthy way, but it was working.

  
  


Until he had to stay with Mr. Stark for a week while May was sent to help at an understaffed hospital a state or two away.

  
  


He hadn't even arrived at the compound but Peter knew what was happening, knew that Tony would notice and not let it continue but Peter didn't know whether to be angry or grateful for it.

  
  


His carefully broken system was being pushed and shattered but maybe he could hold the pieces together well enough to get through the week.

  
  
  


\---

  
  
  


As it turns out, he couldn't. Tony had taken one look at him and immediately stated that they were skipping the lab that day and instead would be heading up to the living room to lounge and watch movies.

  
  


"You look like a racoon, kid." The man had poked his cheek near the corner of his eye playfully but Peter could hear the underlying concern in his voice.

  
  


"As if you look any better." Peter had sassed back, cringing inwardly at the obvious forced lightness to his voice.

  
  


Yeah, his charade wouldn't last a second around Tony.

  
  


The rest of the evening had passed with the two of them watching whatever shows they bounced between on Netflix and then eating the takeout that Tony had ordered, Pepper joining them just as it arrived.

  
  


Peter could almost forget that he had to sleep that night. He had tried to but the anxiety of staying at the tower with Tony and Pepper for the first time was weighing down on him. Okay, yeah, he'd stayed before but that was in the medbay after accidents on patrols, not a specific amount of time or reason like now. They'd also had many movie nights and lab days but he always went home.

  
  


Peter was jerked from his thoughts by Tony nudging his leg from where he sat on the other end of the couch. "You with me, kid?"

  
  


"Uh, ye- yeah, no, I'm here." Peter muttered as he tried to bring himself back to reality. "Sorry."

  
  


Tony looked at him, a slight frown creasing his forehead. "You feeling okay? You've been a bit more spacy than usual."

  
  


"Just tired. Sorry." Peter hummed absent-mindedly and Tony nudged him again.

  
  


"No needless apologies, kid." He reminded the teen. "We discussed it, remember?"

  
  


"Yeah, yeah. I know, so– uhh… I know." Tony couldn't help the amusement that bubbled inside of him when Peter floundered with the almost apology.

  
  


Worry still grew inside of him too.

  
  


"You sure you're good though?" Tony asked again.

  
  


"Yes, Mr. Stark. I'm just tired."

  
  


"How about an early night, then?" Pepper's voice rang from her place in the kitchen as she made herself tea.

  
  


_When did she go to the kitchen?_ Peter wondered to himself before realizing what the woman had said. Anxiety suddenly flooded him and his eyes widened, breath catching slightly.

  
  


_No, I don't wanna go to bed. I can't._

  
  


Tony saw the way Peter's eyes widened before they went blank once again. He almost thought he was imagining it until he saw the tension in Peter's shoulders.

  
  


"Yeah, that uh– that sounds like it might be a good idea." 

  
  


_No it doesn't._

  
  


The thought of having to go and lay with his thoughts as company wasn't appealing to Peter but he didn't know how to get out of it now.

  
  


"Good." Pepper smiled at him. "Spider babies need their beauty sleep."

  
  


Peter only vaguely remembers his response as his mind drifted slightly more away.

  
  


"Are you sure it isn't Mr. Stark that needs his beauty rest?"

  
  


The following laughter from Pepper and sputtering from Tony is the last clear thing that Peter recalls until he suddenly found himself on the floor with his back up against the couch and his legs tangled in the blanket half falling off the cushions.

  
  


A hand gripped his shoulder and another one was holding his own against a firm chest. Following the line of the hand, Peter looked up into the worried eyes of Mr. Stark. The older man was saying something but it was too far away, too muffled, for Peter to decipher.

  
  


The teenager was distracted by a strange ache in his chest. It felt like there was something pushing against his ribs, the pressure building and flowing up to his head. His eyelids started to close when there was a sudden stinging in his cheek.

  
  


"Peter! You need to breathe, kid! You can't check out on us now." Tony's frantic voice sliced through the fog clouding Peter's brain and everything crumbled with it. Light, sound, and touch all flooded back and for those first moments Peter was blindsided by the input before it calmed.

  
  


"Peter!" That was Pepper from behind him to one side. "Breathe, Sweetheart. You need to breathe. Follow Tony, feel his chest as he breathes. You can do it."

  
  


That was when he realised that Tony holding his hand against his chest was to help him follow the exaggerated rhythm of the man's own breathing. Drawing in a breath was difficult, his lungs and chest fighting for relief but his brain not wanting to listen.

  
  


Choking in tiny mouthfuls was all that Peter could do in the next minutes until, finally, his chest started to loosen and he was able to gulp in more air.

  
  


Through it all Tony's hands never left his shoulder and where he was pressing their other hands to his chest. Tony knelt in front of him and Pepper sat near them, her calm and quiet presence helping in itself to calm Peter in turn.

  
  


They stayed that way until the only remnants of Peter's panic was a burning in his throat and shaking hands. The exhaustion started settling in and his head tilted forward, thudding against Tony's collar as the man moved his hands to cradle him closer.

  
  


"M'Sorry." Peter's voice was barely loud enough to hear.

  
  


Pepper ran her hand gently across Peter's back and he was reminded of May when she would help calm him during an attack. "You have nothing to be sorry for." Pepper said to him, and he felt Tony nod in agreement.

  
  


"You were dissociating and you started panicking. You back with us now, Bug?" 

  
  


Peter only gave a weak shrug in answer.

  
  


"Okay." Tony murmured. "That's okay. Can you tell us what happened? What triggered this?"

  
  


Peter was silent for a moment, contemplating if he wanted to go into it now because he knew that Tony wouldn't let this slide completely and that even if he got out of it now, the man would question him in the morning again.

  
  


Eventually he nodded, his head never leaving Tony's chest.

  
  


Pepper and Tony stayed quiet, waiting for him to speak if he was ready to.

  
  


"Brain was loud, too much. Scary. Didn't wanna sleep, it doesn't let me sleep." Peter's abstractness worried Tony but he knew from his own experience that it was because of the exhaustion currently settling after the rush of panic.

  
  


And then Peter's words registered. _Oh, Kid._

  
  


"Why didn't you say anything, Petey?" Pepper asked before Tony could.

  
  


"Cuz it was stupid. Shouldn'a let it affect me like that."

  
  


Tony spoke immediately, a vehemence in his voice Peter didn't often hear. "You and what you feel are _never_ stupid, you hear me? You are valid, Bud, and so are your fears and troubles."

  
  


He didn't know why but hearing that brought tears to Peter's eyes. "I'm so tired!" He cried and it broke Tony and Pepper's hearts. "I just want to sleep and for it to be quiet!"

  
  


"Is there anything we can do?"

  
  


Peter hesitated and Pepper jumped on it. "We'll do whatever we can, okay?"

  
  


Shaking his head Peter muttered something. Tony nudged him slightly on the head with his chin.

  
  


"It's embarrassing!" 

  
  


Tony pulled back and lifted Peter's chin to look him in the eyes. "I've done plenty of embarrassing things in my life, Peter. This can't be worse than even half of said things that I've done."

  
  


Peter was tempted to try and brush it off but the older man had called him by his name. He never did that. Only when I needed Peter to really listen, to realise just how important what he was saying was.

  
  


"I can't sleep alone after panic attacks." Peter admitted, his voice small, embarrassed. "I used to climb in with May and- with May, but I stopped cuz I'm too old."

  
  


"So what do you do then?"

  
  


"I can't sleep after them and if I do try I just get nightmares and more attacks so I stay awake."

  
  


The couple shared a glance over Peter's head. "Okay, that's not happening anymore." Pepper said before she continued, cutting off Peter's question before he could ask it. "What we're gonna do for now is get cleaned up and changed for bed, then we'll head to the movie room with the pillow floors and set up for the night there."

  
  


"That way you won't be alone and we'll all have enough space, okay?" Tony carried on.

  
  


One part of Peter wanted to fight it, to say that he didn't want to be a burden or an annoyance but the other just wanted to be loved, to be held and protected. He let the latter lead for once.

  
  


"Okay. But what about tomorrow? You said 'For now' so what's after?" Peter asked them nervously and this time it was Tony who answered.

  
  


"Tomorrow we're gonna call May and talk to her together after breakfast when her shift ends. I want to talk to her and you about setting up some meetings with a therapist or someone that can help more than all of us could. Is that alright with you?" Tony asked him gently. "Would you be willing to try that out?"

  
  


Peter was nervous of that particular idea but he knew that he couldn't carry on like this so he nodded his head in consent.

  
  


Seeing his nervousness at the idea Pepper cut in before it could build to something more stressful. "That's for tomorrow though. For now let's go and get changed and we can try and see about getting you some sleep." She slid up from the couch behind Tony and Peter before holding out her hands to help them up.

  
  


Before she could let go Peter surged forward and pulled her and Tony into a hug. 

  
  


_Thank you_ , it whispered to them without needing words.

  
  


_You're welcome_ , they hugged him back.

  
  
  


\---

  
  
  


Peter didn't sleep perfectly that night but his sleep was more rested and calm than he had in a long while. His mind almost quiet.

  
  


It wasn't much but it was a start. It would take a while and many setbacks, repetitions of being told he was loved, cared for, and not a burden, but one day he would reach an evening that didn't bring the darkness of his mind with the fading of the sun.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Just a heads up, I'll be editing all of these a few hours or the day after i post once my beta is finished with them. There aren't usually and big changes but I just wanted to let ya'll know:)


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